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S. Pentecost 16.24 Mark 7:24-30

But Jesus said to her… ‘it is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the little dogs’.

Is Jesus a nice guy? Would you say he’s a people-person, that he just luuvs people? The question, in our day, is not even asked, almost never even considered, because we take it as axiomatic that Jesus is a nice guy, a good person, for Christ’s sake!

Modern people cannot even imagine a God who’s not polite, soft-spoken—a friendly man who includes everyone who includes everyone. As one theologian observed: we see God less as a Father in heaven and more as a slightly doddering old grandfather in the home, a little out of it, but nice and well meaning.

This would explain why the world runs so… poorly—in the judgment of most. God means well, but he’s old, literally older than dirt, and just doesn’t understand young people these days and our quite particular needs. But he would never be mean, argumentative, ugly, or unkind to anyone, ever. Because then… well; he wouldn’t fit our definition of a loving God, wouldn’t be a God for us…

This is probably why our Gospel this morning is bracketed by the lectionary as an unnecessary extra part of the reading. Because it really doesn’t fit the mold, the box we like to keep Jesus in. And it’s the reason why I chose it as the only part of the Gospel reading for today. Because it presents a truth about Jesus that few accept as true, but which I think vital.

I think it’s vital because 20th century missional pietism has hollowed out genuine Christianity so it’s almost never found, a strange and troubling thing for people who do bump into the genuine article. Jesus as he actually is hardly ever gets preached. And so, very strange and quite unorthodox ideas about how Jesus actually is, and in turn how Christians should be, dominate.

Why is this bad? Well; in the 20th century, a mania for missions, for outreach, for proselytizing swept over all of Western Christendom, protestants, catholics alike, liberals, conservatives. It was the one thing—in a fractious century—all so-called “Christians” agreed on: that we need to be friendly, warm, engaging, appealing, especially to outsiders and that the Church’s main mission is simply to BE NICE! and to reach out to the unchurched and bring ’em into the fold, by whatever means necessary, even and especially if it means brooming the liturgy and replacing it with a pop-rock sing-along that usually ends with lots of… hugging.

Maybe this was all well-intentioned? I think it was primarily motivated by greed for money and fame among the leading clergy, and a hankering for bigness by nearly all of Christendom. It was the business notion that nothing succeeds like success and bigger is always better, certainly for the bottom line which became increasingly the focus of Christendom’s modern managers.

Instead of seeing the church as Luther and the old fathers did: a a small commando squad caught behind enemy lines, engaged in a life or death battle against the the devil and his legions, a beat-up, beat-down foreign legion type crew, hunkered down in the mighty fortress of the church waiting for God to come and eliminate his enemies with extreme prejudice, Dirty Harry style: “…what you have to ask yourself, punk, is ‘Do I feel… lucky?’

Instead of that, Modern Christendom pictures God as less Dirty Harry, more “Harry Meets Sally”, more like a mildly intoxicated department store Santa asking solicitously, “What can I get you for Christmas, little girl?”

Which is probably why the modern clergy see and run the church like a department store, something for every whim, a for-profit, friendly operation. “You prefer rock to Bach? We can do that! You prefer a self-help group to a battle-scared foreign legion battalion? We can be that!”

I suppose we should be like that, if Jesus is the ultimate Nice Guy Department Store Santa he’s seen as today…

But, what if Jesus is not like that at all? What if he’s not a people person? What if he hates sinners in general, and only puts up with humanity at all because of a few favorites that he sorta likes, sometimes: like Noah, Israel, David, and their kin?

What if he’s like the guy who, when the alarm goes off at 6 am Sunday and his wife nudges him, and says: “You gotta get up, honey. It’s Sunday. Time to go to church.” And the guy groans and goes, “I don’t wanna go to church. I don’t like most of those people, and I don’t think they like me. Give me 3 good reasons why I should go to church.” And his wife says “Well, 1) God commands it, 2) you’re a father and our children need an example, and 3) you’re the pastor, it’s your job.” 😉

Well, look at the first verse of our Gospel: Jesus is passing through Tyre and Sidon, Gentile-land, filled with sinners and haters of Israel. But… he’s not up bright and early in the town square, eagerly preaching love and peace and joy. He’s not running commercials on how he gets us!, either.

No. He’s hiding out in a house, doesn’t want to talk. He just wants to rest. He’s been arguing with Pharisees, vigorously, as we saw last week, pointing out their hypocrisy and sin which is tiring and tiresome. But this ethnic mutt of a woman with a demon-possessed daughter (not uncommon in that part of the world, sure glad we don’t live there!) pleads desperately for Jesus to help.

But, Matthew says: Jesus cold-shouldered her in such a rude, heartless way, even his disciples squirmed.

Jesus icily replies to her anguished cries: “it’s not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the little dogs”. The Greek κυναριος is “little or worthless” dog. Israelites are cat people. They don’t like dogs like we do. They tolerated shepherds, working dogs, but never let ‘em in the house! To call her a dog is provocative, very mean! It’s pure Dirty Harry “Do you feel lucky, punk?” just daring her to return fire.

But she does’t bite (see what I did there… dog, bite? 😉 she just yelps back: “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs under the table eat from the children’s crumbs. Ruuf!”

And that gets him. Does he… smile? Laugh, even? He says: “For this word, go your way; the demon has left your daughter.”

Jesus is a cat-person, an Israel-Person. He hates sinners (Ps. 5:5, 7:11). He only loves Israel because… well, just because. He hates Israel-haters, and will destroy them with extreme prejudice at The Last, like he wiped ‘em out with the Flood in Noah’s day.

If you demand a solicitous, friendly, polite Savior, Jesus isn’t for you. But if you aren’t too proud to beg, if you see you’re not such great company yourself, well, Jesus’s just the bone for you to chew on.

Salvation is always under the table, off the books, a back alley exchange. It’s for hobos, hitchhikers, for worthless dogs who aren’t to proud to beg. If life as a dog sounds just fine to you, Jesus’ll be your Master, will be, for you, Peace, surpassing all understanding, guarding your heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Amen.